On Being Good…For Nothing

Given by James Covington on November 28th, 2004

ON BEING GOOD. . . . FOR NOTHING

At a recent meeting with the facilitators of our Community Circles, we spent some time amongst ourselves exploring from a personal level, the meaning and origin of our moral sensibilities. The ensuing discourse led me to the topic of my sermon today.

I suppose most people view morality as a form of behavior prescribed by the religious institution or religious faith. In an interesting article in the N.Y Times last week, Irshad Manji, a young Muslim woman who calls for reform in Islam in a book entitled: “The Trouble with Islam,” which, by the way, makes her a blasphemer in the eyes of many Muslims, writes that “religion supplies a set of values, including discipline, that serve as a counterweight to the materialism of life in the West.” She referred to Westerners as “robotic mall rats.”

In a “letter to the editor” response to Ms. Manji’s assertion, another woman who identified herself as a “North American secular humanist,” wrote back the following: Ms. Manji’s implication is that religion is the only source of good values. But in the absence of Islam, she could have cultivated a commitment to humanity, beauty, charity, love of nature and faith in evidence, among other noble qualities. . . . Ultimately, Ms. Manji and I both consider ourselves ‘independent-minded’ women. Ms. Manji may get her guidance from the Koran, and I from Proust, but I’ll bet we share a common morality.

How many of us know of people who claim to be religious, who believe in the church and God, but who nevertheless live lives of greed, dishonesty, even hatred? How many of us know of people who don’t believe in God or religion or the church, but who live lives of civility, decency, and with authentic concern for justice?

Yet, this does not necessarily mean that religion is useless when it comes to moral values. In response to the question I posed: “What is the source of goodness?” I shared with the facilitators group that as a child, I remember wanting to be good. I wanted to do the right thing. I believe most children want to be good and there are probably many psychological reasons for this, which I do not care to address in depth now. I personally believe that I wanted to be good because it was my natural instinct.

When I was about 5 years old, I would disguise myself as some heroic figure, a cross between Batman and Robin Hood and with a cape flowing from my back, a mask over my eyes, I would wrap a nickel or a few pennies, place the coins in a paper bag, gallop down the road where we lived and fling the bag upon a neighbor’s front porch. I was doing a good deed, you see, giving money to people, only to have my neighbors call my parents and complain that I was littering their lawn! Alas, I learned early on, that “no good deed goes unpunished.”

Now “good” can be defined in many ways, the most common association being “obedience” or “subservient.” The word can sound so bland or sugary and shallow. We say, “There goes Miss Goody Two-Shoes,” when actually noting one’s “goodness” as pretentiousness. As children many of us learned to be good as a way of keeping the peace in the family, avoiding disapproval or receiving love. So being good can also mean giving up one’s real self and suppressing one’s true feelings.

I do admit that my quest for goodness was driven in part by all of the above reasons. I remember years ago when a friend told me I was a good person. I reacted angrily and shouted “Don’t tell me I am a good person. I am not a good person. I don’t want to be a good person. That’s my problem. I am tired of being a good boy. I want to be myself!” So, you see, goodness, for me at that time, was a negative.

But “goodness” also means “benevolence, kindness, altruism, honesty, justice, and responsibility.” Now, mind you, I have often failed throughout my life, in the pursuit of moral goodness. But my own instinct tells me that “goodness,’ as so defined, is something I have always known and wished to integrate in my life. None of this sensibility was lost in my Southern Baptist Sunday School class. There I learned the words of Jesus about turning the other cheek; the Beatitudes blessing the peacemakers as children of God. There were calls to sacrifice—“if one asks for your coat, give your cloak also”; forgive 70 times 7. You want to enter the kingdom of heaven? –give all you have to the poor.

I learned that a person cannot hate his neighbor and also say he loves God. I learned that on judgment day there would actually be a test. One would not be asked, did you believe in God or Jesus, but rather, did you visit the sick, those in prison, feed the hungry, and clothe the naked? These were powerful messages that formed and shaped my moral sensibilities.

So what is goodness? Where does it come from? How does one become moral or good or virtuous? Is morality learned? Or is it innate?

Well let me ask you another question. Do you consider yourself a good person? A moral individual? These questions may make you uncomfortable. We don’t like to define ourselves a “moral” because in the minds of many “moral” implies being judgmental or prudish or self-righteous.

I believe many of us truly want to be good persons. We want to be good parents, a good husband or wife or partner, a good friend, a good citizen. It seems to me that much of the time our inclination toward fair play or our sympathy for the plight of others are immediate and instinctive, a reflex of our emotions more than an act of our intellect. Most of us do not break the law most of the time, not simply because we worry about taking even a small chance of getting caught, but also because our conscience forbids our doing what is wrong. By the same token, most of us honor most promises, play games by the rules, respect the rights and claims of others, and work at our jobs even when the boss isn’t looking. We do so in part out of a fear of retribution, but also out of a sense of duty, a desire to please, a belief in fairness, and sympathy for the plight of others. Where did we learn this?

I am aware that scholars need to explain the behavior of societies based upon fear of anarchy. Societies form rules to prevent anarchy, to form solidarity, to constrain a tendency in people toward destructive behavior. After, we all know what awful things we are capable of doing. There is some truth in these arguments. But I am suggesting that there are emotional sentiments which underlie all moral behavior which go far deeper than simply a desire to prevent anarchy—sentiments such as pity, compassion, and sense of fairness.

These sentiments are most vividly present in the bond between a parent and child. Yes, I admit that many parent-child relationships are less than perfect and some are injurious. In fact, I believe that most moral insensitivity leading to tyranny, abuse, murder and crime is due in large part to the lack of such bonding in early life. The ground of all moral learning is a loving home where parents exemplify the virtues of responsibility, compassion and respect. On the whole, most parents feel an enormous sense of good-will and love toward one’s child that serves as the prototype of moral good-will that must exist in the entire world.

This good-will is asserted by most religions. The Bible enjoins us to “love our neighbors as ourselves.” The Koran reminds us that “human beings are worthy of esteem because they are human and that through the kindness of God, you become bound to one another.” Buddha taught compassion and self-sacrifice; “right conduct” was one of the stages of the Eightfold Path. Religious doctrines have much in common in this regard. A list of virtues or duties drawn up by a Buddhist would not differ very greatly from one drawn up by a Christian, a Confucianist, a Muslim or a Jew.

So I return to the question I asked a moment ago: Are you good? I would say that in spite of your flaws and occasional mean-spiritedness, most if not all of you would say you are a good person, and that in fact you would like to be a better person. Why? Think about it? Why are you good? Is it related only to society’s rule and parental upbringing? Or do you feel deep within you somewhere a natural desire for goodness—primordial, cosmic, even eternal in its scope?

So why do you want to be good? Is it solely because you want people to think well of you? Is it because you want to preserve society? Is it because you feel guilty, if you do otherwise? But why would you feel guilty—because you would feel that you have been irresponsible, unfair, hurtful, not true to your highest and deepest self?

There is a story of a Rabbi who “committed an infraction grave enough to call down a judgment from Above. The Divine voice notified the Rabbi that because of his sin he had forfeited his place in heaven. He would be barred from Paradise in the world to come. Upon hearing this judgment, the Rabbi burst into a joyous dance. Perplexed, his students asked him how he could be so cheerful upon hearing that he was refused entry into Paradise. The Rabbi explained: ‘all my life, I always suspected that my good deeds had an ulterior motive. Whenever I fulfilled the commandments, I envisioned the reward I would receive for my good deeds. Now, for the first time, I can serve God purely without any personal hidden agenda.”

The good Rabbi had discovered the importance of being good—for nothing—or should we say, for the simple joy of being good. Or being good for its own sake.

In closing, let me clarify why this subject if important to me. I spoke about moral values in my last sermon. There I spoke about moral values more from a societal perspective. Today’s sermon is delivered with the personal aspect as its focus. In a poll this week by USA Today/CNN/Gallup, it was found that two-thirds of Americans believe our country is declining morally. It is difficult to know what that means of course. In due time, I suppose we will find out.

My hunch is that every generation fears a moral decline. We know that the future of our nation depends on the moral character of our children and how well we teach moral responsibilities and the depth of virtues.

American’s values are often contradictory: we are religious and also materialistic. Americans treasure individualism but revere big corporations; disdain elites but love celebrities. Evangelical Christians champion marriage, but rank among the highest in divorce rates.

But today there is a mighty struggle going on where old nationalistic, tribal ideologies are being pursued. Nationalism gives a sense of security and identity to people. And yet the world is becoming more populated than ever and consequently more pluralistic. The world is becoming smaller by virtue of technology and communication systems. Our natural resources are diminished. Poverty around the world still abounds. The environment is at risk.

How do we live civilly under these conditions? What shall be our moral code? Our moral guide? What should our values be and how do we define them? What do we teach our children in this time of shifting and chaos and fear? Some will want to retreat to the tribal system or to a national ideology or to a fundamentalist religion, as we have already seen, because these do give people a code or right and wrong behavior. Like a child who needs limits from his parents in order to feel secure, all of humanity needs limits, a moral code, in order to feel safe. The world is now a global village with many races, colors, religions. The world is in crisis. But from the perspective of Chinese wisdom, in every crisis, there is opportunity. What is our opportunity now?

This is a time when I believe it imperative that human beings gather together all the resources we can muster to reclaim with confidence our moral predispositions. This is not a time to become overly skeptical or faintful, or discouraged in the face of humanity’s inhumanity. It is rather a time to renew and affirm our faith in the natural impulses toward perseverance, yes, but also toward compassion, responsibility to one another, and justice.

Perhaps what matters most are not values, but virtues. Values may be cited to answer a pollster but virtues are displayed through lives of conviction sustained over time.

In the words of James Q Wilson, Mankind’s moral sense is not a strong beacon light, radiating outward to illuminate in sharp outline all that it touches. It is rather, a small candle flame, casting vague and multiple shadows, flickering and sputtering in the strong winds of power and passion, greed and ideology. But brought close to the heart and cupped in one’s hands, it dispels the darkness and warms the soul.

Closing meditation: Spirit of Life, in these deeply troubled and fearful times, give us the patience and wisdom to pursue with all brothers and sisters of humanity the path to peace and justice. In a complex world, give us the courage and wisdom to live virtuously. Help us to understand not just in our heads, but deep in our flesh that we are one. Give us the courage to speak up, even when it’s difficult and unpopular. Give us always, too, a vision of what we would become, and the wisdom and tenacity to travel the long road. Amen.